Saturday, January 30, 2010

Musings of a post-op - January 2010

So someone gave me a great idea about sharing some of my posts of various forums. I want to share them here. We were discussing Carnie Wilson's show and were questioning her decision of occupational choices. I have edited it a bit so that I could make some things clearer.
I understand totally about questioning her choices but alas, it is something that is totally out of my control. I know she is looking to following her bliss but if I'm a sex addict, I don't think making porn movies would be a healthy choice but this is not my decision and I haven't traveled in her shoes. Truly I have my hands full with my journey and I am almost 9 years out and stayed at goal. I will be totally honest with weight loss journey is not "that" hard but the reason is that I made some choices early on from the very beginning. Before I had surgery I coudn't quit drinking Coke but because I knew I would get sick and because I was so determined to do this thing right, I gave it up. To this day I don't miss it and can't for the life of me figure out why I was so addicted. I came to figure out that by continuing to eat or drink certain things that it kept the craving alive. When you quit eating them, you stop wanting will stop craving them. People will argue with me on this and think that having a little taste will get you past the craving and make you not feel deprived. I use the analogy of an alcoholic. Would you give an alcoholic a taste to get past the craving? Now....if you are one that can eat a little bit of that stuff and you are easily maintaining your goal weight, GO FOR IT! I don't know but a handfull of those people and the reason they succeed is because they log those calories and count them. Regarding deprived??? Deprived to me is regaining my weight and depriving me from the miracle of the surgery I worked so hard to get. After nearly 9 years I have a pretty good system down and that's avoiding sugar like it's poison and even a lot of artficial sweetener because there has been some incredible info regarding the effects of that stuff. It does horrible stuff to your body like depression. You may ask, "well what in the hell am I supposed to do about sweet stuff?" Eat fruit. Get over it. Decide what you want. I weigh daily and fix problems when they are small. I don't even log my food but that's not for everyone. My log is getting on the scale and that keeps me in check. If you believe something is hard, it is. If you appreciate the fact that you got this miracle tool and that you can do less to stay at a normal weight than what you would have to do before you had surgery, it's a breeze! It is hard if you make it hard. It is also hard if you live in this angry, resentful world where everything and everyone pisses you off. I did this to live and to live happy. I avoid the crappy people that want to gripe and whine, show them compassion and move on down the road because I am the one responsible for taking care of my body and part of success is hanging with the winners. Sorry I got so winded..I often do you know.hugs, Y

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